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Do you try to meditate but, instead of inner peace, you are faced with an onslaught of your inner chaos and mind? If so, this post is for you…

I can remember the first time I came across meditation and truly understood it. I was at Buddhafield festival listening to a talk about meditation and mindfulness. I came home very enthusiastic to try it out. I got up early, sat cross-legged, closed my eyes and waited for the stillness. Instead, I was faced with an onslaught of thoughts. I told myself I must be doing it wrong and didn’t try again.

A few years later, I discovered that we have two minds. These are the conscious mind (sometimes referred to as the soul) and the unconscious mind (sometimes known as ego). Suddenly, it clicked. In that moment of experimenting with meditation, I had been flooded with my unconscious mind. All the thoughts I had been forced to hear and witness were part of the programme always running through my mind. 

It was then that I decided to look at meditation in a different way. I felt I could use meditation to access my unconscious mind and discover what is constantly playing on my tape, as that awareness can work on re-recording the tape. 

So, I started meditating and attempting to witness my thoughts while not questioning them but letting them go. I made notes of these thoughts in my journal. I soon discovered which were the limiting beliefs I played over and over again on my inner tape, as they kept on appearing each time I entered the silence of meditation. I no longer searched for the stillness and nirvana that I had read about in meditation books, instead choosing to simply sit and allow my mind to show me its challenges and let them go. 

Over time, I found this chatter became less and less and I was able to witness and let go of the thoughts quicker and quicker. I also became aware when I was in an ungrounded state, as, during meditation, I would feel myself wanting to hold on and question the thoughts as they appeared in my mind.

I believe that many people shy away from meditation for the same reason I did, as they expect stillness and quiet but are faced with the very things they are trying to get away from! But I invite you to step into the void and witness your unconscious mind, so you start to fully understand the programme currently running the show and the limiting beliefs that are the headlining acts in your brain.

So, this week I invite you to set a timer on your phone for five minutes (I use the meditation timer app called Insight Timer). Sit in a comfortable position, away from distracting sounds, and somewhere you can feel safe and won’t be disturbed. Have a journal by your side and a pen. Gently close your eyes and try to clear your mind. As thoughts appear, welcome them and try to let them go. It can sometimes help to visualise them flying away or smashing into pieces. If you get a stubborn thought, simply stop and write it down in your journal, so you can work on it later, as trying to remember it stops you from flowing into the meditation. If a sudden nugget of wisdom appears you may start to focus on trying to remember it rather than meditating. If this happens, stop. Write it down, let go and continue. Remember, it is just as powerful to identify the racing thoughts that appear in silence as sitting in stillness.

Have you had similar experiences with meditation? I’d love you to share in the comments below your insights into the world of meditation and how it has helped you to let go of the thoughts in your head.

Remember, if this post tickles your soul then please feel free to share with friends and family. 

2 thoughts on “Meditation

  1. I love this approach, it makes total sense to me. I used to meditate and journal regularly until my mother’s death two years ago. Since then it’s like I have a brick wall in front of me. I’m going to try this, thank you x

    1. I know I have experienced similar brick walls with intense grief. Sometimes we just need a new approach to be able to find a new rhythm with a beneficial technique. Hope this helps. Let me know how you get on x

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